Before a teacher has uttered a single word, a child knows if s/he is about to be repremanded harshly, redirected gently and firmly, or meekly asked to please not continue to (fill in the blank), "if that's ok!"
How do they know? Our teacher/student relationships and classroom dynamics are established early, perhaps even immediately. Children decide right away if they trust an adult, are wary of her, or are excited to develop a positive relationship with her.
When it comes to redirecting children, the words we choose, our tone of voice, and our body language will dictate every aspect of the success of the interaction. Will the child feel seen and understood, no matter what? Will she feel ashamed? Will he make different choices the next time, or continue to test boundaries?
As human beings, we are creatures of habit. We fall back on our default patterns of communication and use of language. So how can teachers develop healthy, effective auto-responses that support children in their journey of successfully mastering desired behaviors? By practicing a list of repeatable phrases that teachers can use confidently and consistently, with gentle yet firm delivery.
Here are some of our favorite "teacher language phrases" that we practice and implement:
"I'm noticing that...."
"I'm wondering...."
"It's important to...."
"It's time to..."
"Let's make a plan."
Our teachers understand that the word "discipline" comes from the word "disciple." To discipline doesn't mean to punish, it means to teach. What is this child's behavior communicating to us? Which new behavior would we like to help this young child develop? How can we best teach it?
And sometimes, just a simple and unemotional "no" is the ideal redirection method for the moment.
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